I've Lost
Kept asking myself this question, seems that settling down is getting harder as i get older....Why is that so? Pondering....
Just read through my past blog entries months ago....looking back...relieve?regret? It's over anyway.
Dreamt of Lp last week, realised that i really miss him a lot, but i guess he still think otherwise. Called him but seems that he didn't really want to chat with me.
Ended a date that i quite treasured weeks ago..... Guess dragging on will hurt him further. Friends say i'm the bad guy again ... guess so.... but that doesn't mean i feel good does it? Relationship phobia, the word commitment now scares me, i use to love it so much. Sigh...
J thinks i'm a slut. Guess it makes him feel better, can't control myself when i saw him hugging someone at the bar counter last friday, and finally the tears flowed. Dawn saw me and thought i was tearing because i was drunk. Can't stop myself, called gary to ease the tension. For so long, why can't i just let it go? Move on! can't stop thinking.
Went back to punggol flat after so many months.... felt different. No more married couple, sister-in-law left. Now i see my friends staying there, a loving couple.....so sweet...happy for them. Cheers! Looking forward for alvin di to bbq at the sky garden outside....such a great place!
Anson got enlisted liao....wahahaha....time for him to grow up i guess. Hope he will be a better man after his bmt. Will see him when he books out...lolx...mr. botak.
Clubbing seems so empty recently, or am i too used to it. Same songs, same drink, same faces and same drama? Can't seems to quit clubbing.... guess there's nothing much to do other than that on weekends nights. Kind of miss the days with Ked and Gary at marina mandarin lounge.
Jack is out of love again, guess it's another distress period for him again. hope he get over it soon. Just realised we've known each other for quite long, from the time we started dating 4 years back. Time flies....He seems to have matured quite a bit.
Kind of lost with my life now.... lost the drive to do stuffs, lost the faith in love, lost the trust i had.
Just read through my past blog entries months ago....looking back...relieve?regret? It's over anyway.
Dreamt of Lp last week, realised that i really miss him a lot, but i guess he still think otherwise. Called him but seems that he didn't really want to chat with me.
Ended a date that i quite treasured weeks ago..... Guess dragging on will hurt him further. Friends say i'm the bad guy again ... guess so.... but that doesn't mean i feel good does it? Relationship phobia, the word commitment now scares me, i use to love it so much. Sigh...
J thinks i'm a slut. Guess it makes him feel better, can't control myself when i saw him hugging someone at the bar counter last friday, and finally the tears flowed. Dawn saw me and thought i was tearing because i was drunk. Can't stop myself, called gary to ease the tension. For so long, why can't i just let it go? Move on! can't stop thinking.
Went back to punggol flat after so many months.... felt different. No more married couple, sister-in-law left. Now i see my friends staying there, a loving couple.....so sweet...happy for them. Cheers! Looking forward for alvin di to bbq at the sky garden outside....such a great place!
Anson got enlisted liao....wahahaha....time for him to grow up i guess. Hope he will be a better man after his bmt. Will see him when he books out...lolx...mr. botak.
Clubbing seems so empty recently, or am i too used to it. Same songs, same drink, same faces and same drama? Can't seems to quit clubbing.... guess there's nothing much to do other than that on weekends nights. Kind of miss the days with Ked and Gary at marina mandarin lounge.
Jack is out of love again, guess it's another distress period for him again. hope he get over it soon. Just realised we've known each other for quite long, from the time we started dating 4 years back. Time flies....He seems to have matured quite a bit.
Kind of lost with my life now.... lost the drive to do stuffs, lost the faith in love, lost the trust i had.
posted by Jaron @ 6:10 AM
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